What you need to know about having a Santa fetish
He makes you sit on your lap, you saw Mummy kissing him, and he’s partial to a bit of red.
Yes, we are talking about Santa Claus.
It’s not hard to see why he’s so loved all over the world.
After all, he’s very, er, giving and loves animals. Two things that certainly aren’t red flags.
But some people take a love for Father Christmas a little further than the norm. We’re talking about people with a Santa fetish (also known as Santaphilia).
Chances are you’ve probably dated someone who is into some kind of fetish. Maybe you don’t agree with them necessarily. Take the case of race play. Or maybe you’ve dated someone with a fetish when you don’t have one.
A Santa fetish is indeed a real thing, people – even if you don’t want to think that the man who rides Rudolph could be riding something else.
On Reddit, one man who was a former shopping mall Santa said: ‘On average, once per night, someone would sit on my lap and whisper the filthiest, x-rated description of what she was going to do to me when I “came down her chimney” on Christmas Eve.’
Meanwhile, on FetLife, a popular social networking site for members of the fetish community, 128 kinksters reported being into getting spanked by Santa.
59 were on Santa’s naughty list and 62 wanted to get a spanking from Saint Nick.
We decided to go on the hunt for people who had a thing for Father Christmas to find out more about what it’s like to have Santaphilia.
Metro.co.uk spoke to Keith who said: ‘It helps that I’m generally attracted to older men, especially those who belong to the ‘bear’ archetype.
‘Santa Claus could be regarded as what we call a “polar bear” in the gay community. His most appealing features are definitely his beard and body type in my opinion.’
Taylor, 26, a sex educator from Canada, agrees. He told Metro.co.uk that he never realised he had a Santa fetish until recently.
‘When it comes to the type of men I like, I have a strong preference for bears and silver bears are even better,’ Taylor explains. ‘I love the strength that bears have, their mix of tough and soft.
‘I love men who know how to laugh and have fun, ones who can take and give a joke.’
So why do some people develop a fetish for the man we associate with our childhood and family festivities?
Could it be the connotations of naughty and nice that St Nick provokes?
After all, the constant threat of no presents if we’ve been a ‘bad girl/boy’ can easily provoke some thoughts that certainly wouldn’t fit into his good books.
Taylor seems to think so.
‘In terms of my submission, I enjoy having to earn things,’ he notes. ‘I want to work to earn rewards or to hear him call me a good boy.
‘There is something paternal about a Santa Claus; something loving and doting, cheerful and playful.
‘But there’s also something strict about him; he watches us every minute, keeps track of all the good and bad we do, and is going to punish or reward us based on our behaviour – sounds like a 24/7 dominant/submission dynamic to me.
‘He is a delicious mixture of masculine energy and nurturing dominant; he knows how to pick punishments that are geared to help his naughty boys and girls improve themselves.
‘The idea of “Santa” takes my favourite physical traits and favourite personality traits and combines them. He also manages to portray some of my favourite ways for a man to be dominant.
‘Plus, everyone loves getting presents.’
We spoke to counsellor Debra Walsh from Instant Counselling to unpick why people get a hard-on for St Nicholas.
She tells Metro.co.uk it could be a manifestation of childhood Christmas memories, either good or bad.
Keith agrees: ‘Santa Claus is also described in most fictional accounts to have a kind and giving personality, bringing joy to the children of the world and bearing them gifts every Christmas.
‘These are qualities in men that appeal to me in real life.
‘When you combine both Santa’s physical attributes and his personality, you end up with a man, albeit fictional, who actually has quite a bit of sex appeal.’
Debra adds that Santa may be a ‘father figure’, and represents someone who is safe, warm, and provides security that may be missing in their life. But that doesn’t mean everyone who likes Santa has daddy issues.
Debra says for others with a Santa fetish, it may purely be down to the fact that he is a ‘mythical, unobtainable figure whom they have projected their sexual fantasies towards’.
If you have a thing for the man that comes down our chimneys, don’t panic. Debra says fantasies are perfectly healthy unless they become ‘full blown obsessions which begin to have a detrimental effect on a person’s everyday life’.
So if your lover refuses to have sex with you *unless* you don a Santa costume (or vice versa), maybe there’s a little problem.
But until then, feel free to leave your pie out for him.
We mean mince pies, obviously.